


feathers like ink

by taiyakeo



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Happy valentines everybody, M/M, OH also! clarification, Soulmate AU, Why do I do this to myself, also tendou's a little shit, also there's some culture ish in there, especially to heil, haha im so funny and creative, hmm.. there's a theme in my writing, i had fun inventing things!, i had to edit caps into it, i love writing him, i wrote this all in lowercase im so sorry, it is definitely not boys being sad and then being comforted, my giftee, no beta we die like men, nobody can stop me from writing historical fiction, satori can read people's minds, so that's what the italics are when he and his mom are "talking", sugawara's a crow tengu, tendou's a satori, they're just thinking very hard at each other, tw: tendou being bullied, whom i love with aaalllllllll my heart, wow i love finding typos 0.5 seconds after posting, wow i wonder what it could be, youkai AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-14
Updated: 2020-02-14
Packaged: 2021-02-22 09:54:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,309
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22714180
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/taiyakeo/pseuds/taiyakeo
Summary: Tendou knew of the crow tengu who lived beyond his village. He knew of their beautiful dark feathers that they didn't bother to hide, the glinting eyes searching constantly for the sharp and shiny, and of their cruelty, the way they tossed aside everything that wasn't of interest to them. Even other youkai.He knew, too, of Sugawara, who wasn't so bad.
Relationships: Sugawara Koushi/Tendou Satori
Comments: 2
Kudos: 32
Collections: Haikyuu Valentines





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> HAPPY VALENTINES DAY!!!!!!!!!!!! i wrote this for my beautiful amazing cute sweet giftee, heil, and i cannot express just how much love i have in my heart for her!!!! tensuga is beautiful, thank you for the prompts heil!! i had so so much fun writing this!!!!!!

His mother was busy in the morning, and the small rooms that belonged to them were flooded with the smell of her vegetables, steamed rice and fish. He was proud of her; she sold the best-tasting vegetables out of anybody in the market. 

_Tendou,_ she called, beckoning with one hand as she stirred the pot. _Come._

She did not speak because she did not want to wake the people who rented rooms from them. Goshiki, the goshawk tengu, slept soundly and would not have awoken even if the entire house fell down on them, but the cuckoo tengu, Shirabu, would definitely have had something cutting to say if he was roused from his sleep. Tendou pitied him slightly; he knew that Shirabu rarely got enough rest, so he said nothing of his bitterness even if his tongue itched to mock him. 

He padded slowly over to her, ducking into the kitchen.

Without looking at him, she poured some of her vegetables and rice into small bowls, stacking them one on top of the other and sliding them over. 

_For the crow tengu._

Tendou paused. He drew his hands back from where they'd been stretched out to take the bowls. 

_But--_

She shook her head. They ordered it. You will bring it to them.

He bit his tongue and took up the bowls, feeling their warmth with gladness, for the morning was cold despite the fire that flickered in the side of the room; coal was scarce and increasingly difficult to come by by the day. 

_Oh, and Tendou--_

He was already halfway out the door. When he turned, she gave the markings on his arm a meaningful look. 

_Look for them._

_I know._

They did this every morning. 

He knew what the markings meant to him. Every single inhabitant of the village had a different marking, a small symbol, a small clue as to who they would be with forever. His mother's had been a single inked scar on her finger, matching exactly that of his father's. His was a smattering of feathers, black as the ink he used to write, or as the river downstream after it had been cursed. Crow feathers, his mother said, but they could just have easily been the feathers of a thrush. In some lights they almost looked grey, but anything could appear to be a different colour in low light.

_You'll miss it if you don't look out for it,_ she said. _Now go._

She always sent him to the tengus when anything had to be delivered to them; she wanted him to find his soulmate as quickly as possible. Hopefully they would be somebody useful, she always said. 

He began the short walk to the crow tengus' village. He had to walk down a hill, and then along the blackened stream swimming with youkai he never wanted to come to blows with even if he could have easily beaten them, and then upslope where the buttercups flowered. The air was sweet when he opened his mouth to taste it, carrying with it the scent of each and every youkai that had passed that morning, and the stale scent of those who had come recently before that.

"You must be Satori-san," a voice said from behind him. He did not flinch; he had expected it. The voice was gentle and sweet, but carried an edge to it. 

"Yes, that's me." 

He flashed a smile, turning to bow to the person, careful so as to not drop the bowls. It would be unpleasant to get an earful from his mother after all her hard work cooking and having had to walk all the way there. 

"Ah--" The crow tengu fumbled in his cloak's pockets, turning them inside-out. "It seems I have forgotten my payment." His eyes were calm. "Will you come and get it?" 

Tendou was unimpressed. He could at least have emptied his mind. Whatever, I'll teach him a lesson. 

"Sure," he said, bowing again and enjoying the haste with which the boy bowed back; he had caught him off-guard. "Y'know, you crow tengu are pretty useful to us villagers. Never try any funny stuff with payment, and y'always give us good stuff we can use to barter." 

He made sure to speak calmly, all the time monitoring the train of thoughts running like clear water through the boy's mind. 

"It's all we have." 

Tendou nodded, glancing up at the small huts that seemed to hang from the trees above.

"I can't climb, y'know. you'll have to--" He raised his eyebrows. 

He was satisfied at the smell of distress leaking out of the crow tengu. _Serves you right,_ he thought. 

"O--f course," he said, cracking a smile. 

_Impressive._

He turned, spreading his wings out as evenly as he could and crouching down low enough for Tendou to clamber on top of him, taking off with a small noise of effort. The flapping of his wings was uncomfortable, and his feathers were ticklish, and Tendou resisted the urge to kick him only because he had asked to be flown up. 

"I'm not used to carrying people," he said through his teeth. "Kind of--Difficult--" 

Tendou admired the ease with which he was able to tell untruths. Of course he was a better liar, but this boy was able to rein in the stench of guilt. 

"Sorry," he said, insincerely. 

When they tumbled clumsily through the door of what was assumedly the boy's hut, Tendou dusted himself off and looked around. It was neat, and carried the sweet and pleasantly aromatic odour of sedge. 

"Early spring," Tendou said, casually. "You propagate them then, right?" 

The boy nodded and smiled guardedly. Tendou was satisfied. He had the sense that he had invited Tendou up simply to unnerve him, or to get something out of him, but was now regretting it. Of course. He tended to try to be subtly difficult with people the first time, just to see what they were like. He liked feeling like he had the upper hand.

"I'm a doctor, kind of. I, well--see, I specialise with certain sorts of plants, a kind of herbal medication, and I suppose you've noticed that I've been using sedge an awful lot." He gestured slightly at the small area next to an opening in the walls where herbs were stacked tidily. "So my hut smells like it. Isn't that right, Satori-san?"

He emphasised the _satori_ , and Tendou knew then that he was slightly irritated by the mind-reading. He had been told it was uncomfortable for others to be read, physically (something like an intense headache? He wasn't exactly sure, never having felt the discomfort himself) so he stopped for a moment, watching the boy relax. 

"Sugawara-san," he said, finally speaking his name. "You've been stalling with the payment, yeah?"

A tight smile stretched over Sugawara's face; he rubbed at the back of his neck. 

"I'm sure you know what i'm going to say, Satori-san." He ducked his head a little, and Tendou was annoyed that he was unable to tell if the gesture was shy or condescending. Perhaps a mix of both, but without his reading he could not be sure. 

"I'm quite sure I don't." 

He held out his hands as though he were about to make a favourable proposal. 

"I'm unsure if you've noticed, but--well--" Sugawara cleared his throat and rolled up his sleeves, turning awkwardly so that the markings on his arm were visible. They were coloured green, and if he squinted he could see leaves, and--

_Ah, vegetables._

Tendou raised his eyebrows and pulled up his sleeves to flash the feather markings. 

"I've been rude," he said, slowly. "Sorry." 

"No need." 

They bowed, both at the same time, because neither knew quite what to say (a first for Tendou), and laughed. Tendou was a little embarrassed; he should have been more careful. He knew that his soulmate would likely be a tengu, and yet he had fallen back into his habit of playing around with others' minds. Well, no matter. Sugawara would understand, surely. 

"I take it you're not disappointed?" Sugawara tilted his head slightly, and Tendou saw mirrored in his eyes the faint anxiety that he felt deep in his stomach. It was natural to be worried; nobody wanted their soulmate to reject them. 

"Not if you aren't."

They laughed again, and Tendou decided that he was comfortable.


	2. Chapter 2

They ate the vegetables together in one of the other smaller huts that day, which Tendou assumed was dedicated to eating. It smelled sweet here, too, though the crow tengu seemed not to be too picky with their food and not all of them ate sweet food; a few of them ate meat. He had assumed that all of them ate mainly meat, but that was wrong, he supposed. He had heard, too, that the crow tengu ate carrion, but that seemed not to be the case either. He wondered if the other youkai had not villainised the crow tengu simply because they stayed up in the trees, above everything else, and the mystery made them afraid. 

"I never thought my soulmate would be a vegetable seller," Sugawara said as he took a bite of some rice. "I assumed it'd have something to do with my profession. I used to think my markings were herbs." 

"I knew mine were tengu feathers, but I didn't know what kind, y'know? Kinda makes me wish they'd be more specific." 

Sugawara smiled and shrugged. "We found each other, anyway." 

Tendou raised a finger suddenly, jolting where he sat on the floor of the hut as he remembered something.

"Is it true that crow tengu can caw? I've never heard tengu like--you know, call." 

He expected Sugawara to be offended at the very least, but he quite cheerfully dipped his head and gave a quiet caw.

"Was that quite enough?" He smiled, almost as though he were embarrassed. 

"They have different meanings, right? Your caws?" 

Sugawara nodded. "That one was to express joy. You know, since…" He gestured at Tendou's marking and smiled again. "I can't do it loudly here, because it would be rude." 

That made sense. 

"When do you choose to use those calls? When do you speak, y'know, normally?" 

"We speak when we want to be understood by other youkai, like right now. We don't when we're saying something rude about somebody who won't be able to understand, or when we feel something we can't express with your words." 

Tendou nodded slowly. He had guessed there were more to the crow tengus than he had previously thought. It was difficult, sometimes, to remember that other youkai were not all that the rumours said of them. 

"Am I like what you thought satori were?" He cocked his head.

Sugawara hummed a little. "Well, kind of. I'd heard you were a little bit nosy--"

He made an inappropriately loud offended noise, attracting the curious gazes of the crow tengu, who by now had realised that there was a stranger in their midst.

"--And I also heard that you like to test other people's patience." Sugawara continued as though Tendou had not interrupted him. "I guess that part's true."

He made a face, though for the most part Sugawara was right. Satori were pretty nosy by other youkai's standards. 

He felt itchy. More and more crow tengu were sending brief glances his way, doing double-takes, or blatantly staring at him. He was used to being the one observing, carefully judging, and now that the roles were flipped he had the urge to jump out of one of the hut's windows. 

"You look uncomfortable," Sugawara said. "Have I offended you?" 

"No. Of course not." He took another bite of vegetables.

It was difficult to swallow. 

"How about we go back? Maybe the smell is too much for you. I should've thought more about the change in your environment." 

Tendou shook his head but found himself being dragged out of the eating hut back into Sugawara's anyway and was glad for it, deep in his stomach, but strangely annoyed.

"I apologise. I should have considered your comfort first. It's alright to eat in here." 

Tendou shrugged and made a noncommittal noise. "I'm not uncomfortable." 

"Ah. I guess I read you wrongly, then."

He was itchy. Again.

"I've bothered you too long," he said. "I think I'll be off. I'll be back with a new delivery when you need it. Please don't hesitate to contact my mother if you need a new order."

Sugawara frowned, and Tendou didn't have to read his mind to know that he was worried. or frustrated.

"I'll send you down," he said, standing, and before long Tendou was back on the ground. 

"Thank you for today. I'll be back."

"You'd better be. Or else"--he flapped his wings playfully--"I'll come and hunt you down, and then you'll know not to inconvenience me." 

Tendou laughed, but everything felt wrong. Like his head wasn't on his body. Like his arms were miles away from his shoulders. Everything was off. He couldn't describe the feeling well, but it was one he'd had since he was a child. 

"I'll go, then." 

They bowed again, at the same time, and Tendou started walking back. He knew without turning around that Sugawara was waving. 

He was such a coward.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: bullying!! please skip this chapter if you're not comfortable with it

_Why can't you read the mood?_

He was trapped. All the blood rushed out of his head like the water when his mother poured it out after washing her rice.

"I'm not--"

"You're always reading us, you know, it's not like you can't stop yourself from saying bad things. You're really mean." 

Didn't they say meaner things? It wasn't his fault he knew. It wasn't on purpose. 

"I can't control it," he said, softly, but everybody was glaring at him. Eyes, eyes, eyes, eyes. 

_What a terrible guy. Why can't he just shut up? He doesn't need to talk all the time. Irritating. Annoying. If he can't even respect our privacy why doesn't he just leave? Somebody should lock him up where nobody's around, then he can never read us again. He's just a monster. I feel so bad for his soulmate._

A monster amongst monsters. Wasn't he just like the rest of them?

He felt like he was being torn apart, organs distributed amongst the students to be grasped in sweaty hands, to be stared at and prodded before his eyes. Exposed. He was guilty, but he knew he hadn't done anything wrong. 

"I'm sorry." 

_You'd better be._

_I bet he doesn't mean it._

_If he's really sorry he'll go away forever._

The group dispersed, the scrape of chairs against the floor like nails down a chalkboard. It was silent. He kept his head down.

They were still looking at him.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> me? projecting on every single character i write? whatever could you mean

Tendou woke with the feeling of eyes on his back. 

It was spring already, when the pollen grains got up his nose and gave him a headache and he could not stop scratching his arms. The morning was warm; sunlight was already dyeing the floor the colour of ginkgo leaves. He had not had the dream in years, but it was back now.

_Good morning._

He walked into the kitchen. Goshiki sat at the table, chatting to his mother about something or other. 

_Would you mind delivering this to Fukunaga-san?_ She pushed two bowls towards him. _You know where the manekineko are, yes? I have something for the crow tengu too. Sugawara-san._

He took each bowl without complaining and left. First, to the manekineko village, just across a river, then back across, down the hill, down the stream, and upslope. 

He found Sugawara in a clearing. He was sitting, staring at his wrists. 

"Sugawara-san," he said. 

"Ah--Satori-san?" Sugawara stood and bowed a little. He cocked his head. Hesitance. "Would you mind coming up with me?" 

He nodded slowly and let Sugawara fly him up. They sat in silence for a short while, and then Sugawara spoke. 

"I'm sorry about last time. I'm sure the staring made you uncomfortable. I should have thought about it." 

"There was no way you would have known. There's no need to apologise." 

He still looked ashamed, which surprised Tendou. What sort of youkai would be guilty even after being assured of their innocence? Most would have snapped up offer to stop feeling guilt. He found himself sharing in the shame. He had walked out, not considering Sugawara's feelings. 

"It's okay. Really." He was surprised that he meant it. He reached out to pat Sugawara's hair, which was softer than he had imagined. "Don't worry." 

Sugawara laughed, unsure, but leaned his head towards Tendou's hand anyway. 

"Please tell me how I can make you comfortable." 

He shuddered involuntarily. "Of course." 

Sugawara shot him a look of doubt but said nothing, sighing and shifting his head to rest on Tendou's shoulder. He stiffened and adjusted his position; he could not hunch when Sugawara was on him. 

"Would you like to eat together?" He could feel the rumble of Sugawara's voice against his shoulder, which was strange in a good way.

"Can we stay here?"

Sugawara nodded and reached for the bowl. By then its contents would have been cold, but Sugawara seemed not to mind.

_Crow tengu eat anything,_ he thought, then dismissed it. He could not let himself be prejudiced. 

"When I was young"--Sugawara spoke suddenly between bites--"I always thought people were staring at me. My feathers are a bit lighter in colour, you see, and they thought I was different. That's why I stand up straight, to hide my wings. It's--You know? You just feel like people are always watching you. You feel their eyes." 

Tendou frowned. Why was he saying this? 

"I'm sorry that happened." 

"No, just--I don't know. I wondered if you felt like that, the other day." Sugawara flicked a wing self-consciously. "I'm sorry if I read you wrongly again." 

"You didn't," he said quietly. "I do feel like that." 

The words stung his throat. He had never told his mother that it hurt when people called him a monster. _That's what we are, youkai. Monsters._ He had not let the other children know that they had won, but they had, and saying it now hurt. It made him feel as though he had done nothing, as though all the time he had spent burying his pain was fruitless now that it had been dug up again.

"It never seems to leave." Sugawara was smiling, and Tendou felt like he was looking into his soul, but surprisingly not in a way that felt awful, invasive and disgusting. It was not as though he were rummaging through him to find rotten bits, but rather reaching out, like he had found his heart. 

"I guess we're the monsters of monsters."

Sugawara reached out to bump their soul marks together. "Maybe that's why this happened, huh?" 

"I guess so." 

Tendou sighed and leaned back, letting the warmth of Sugawara's head calm him. He was not going to cry, but there was a sort of sweet sadness in him. The shame had gone by then, but he was only faintly proud of himself for a reason he could not explain. 

Sugawara opened his mouth and closed it again, and Tendou laughed softly.

"You look like a fish." 

Sugawara choked and pushed at tendou harder than he'd intended, evident in the flicker of surprise on his face, and a small scuffle ensued, ending with them both on the floor, the bowl still safely on the seat. They stayed there, comfortable (though both would wake with cricks in their necks the next morning) and Tendou was glad.

There were things they both could not say to each other, Tendou sensed. Not yet. But that was okay. They would get to it. They could be happy for now.


End file.
